Helloooooo Memory!
Thinking back to 1970 and the release of Cat Steven's song "Miles from Nowhere", there were times when I considered Newport actually being "Nowhere" and the song title was an appropriate appellation for me. Of course such thoughts were being generated in the mind of a "young adult" (he called himself an "adult" as those around him laughed out loud) who had big dreams of attaining fame and fortune in "the big city" well beyond the limited boundaries of "Nowhere, Arkansas". Well, over the years I have come to realize that Newport is "Somewhere" filled with loving and caring people known to us as family and friends. It is not just a "good place to be from". It was, and is, a good place to call home and on June 17, 2000, a good place to be. It isn't the place in which one grows up that that makes it that homeplace worthy of good thoughts and, therefore, good memories; it is the friends and family members with whom you have shared life who make the place (in our case, Newport) "special" in the book of memories.
June 17, 2000, Newport, Arkansas -- The Place to Be! We have friends there (and more coming from places like Nowhere, Oklahoma; Nowhere, Hawaii; Nowhere, Texas; Nowhere, Louisiana; Nowhere, North Carolina; Nowhere, Alabama; Nowhere; Kansas; Nowhere, Pennsylvania and other well known places around the globe). While I may periodically still think of myself as being "Miles from Nowhere" (as you may too), on June 17 I will be where I want to be surrounded by friends. News from Cherry Lou, Headmistress of the Scheming Committee for the 30 Year Bash, informs us of 71 Hounds signed up to be in the Port for this reunion. I want there to be more. The more the merrier, or something like that. I do not know who those 71 former classmates are for certain. I know some have told me that they were going to be there for the reunion, or "try" to be there, but I do not know if they have in fact sent in the stuff that makes the world go 'round --- Money! Have you sent in your money Drew Stewart? How about you, Scott Baker? And you, Greer Guinn? Hey Scheming Committee, what about Ruth Johnston, Joy Stanfield, Jim Reid Holden, Kearney Blalack, Robert Lake, Billy Don Summers, Gail Thaxton, Freeman Travis, Ricky Wiggins? You get the picture. Let's All Get Together and Have a Good Time!
This past week I have heard from David Reid, Kathy Foley McKee, Dale Hunter Lane, Diane Madison Lumpkin, Mary Wynne Parker Perryman and, of course, Cherry Lou. And I "talked" with one of my closest childhood friends, Donny Appleton. Donny Rooster and I had a wonderful conversation and planned to play golf while in Newport for the reunion. Donny told me he would bring some extra golf balls so I would not have to spend any time looking for lost balls in the woods or in the water (combination of poor golfer and being cheap). We reminisced over the past 48 years (we are both vintage April '52 as is Mary Wynne) and laughed a lot.
David Reid continued the "walk down memory lane" in recalling former teachers we experienced in grades one through twelve. He remembered Kate Rogers as well as the mothers of two of our classmates, Mrs. Artymowski and Mrs. Wiggins. David's brain must have relapsed in this tedious process of remembering, or he was being reborn into high school, because I could swear he was "speaking" (typing) in tongues. It appeared to be some form of Algebraic French in which he was speaking as he "went back" to the days of tutelage from Mrs. Artymowski and Mrs. Wiggins. I remember getting into a heap of trouble in Mrs. Wiggins class one day and ended up with the pleasure of having the trouble resolved by Mr. Wiggins in his private office. I was definitely on the wrong end of the paddle. And it was all over a silly misunderstanding about an algebraic problem which had a resulting answer of "2b". I simply did not understand (not unusual for me) and questioned the answer by standing on my desk and stating in oratorical fashion, "2b, or not 2b, that is the question!" After my "meeting" with Mr. Wiggins, I understood not to question Mrs. Wiggins. I think it had something to do with her not appreciating Shakespeare.
Speaking of Shakespeare, David also asked if Scott Baker would be re-releasing any features from the archives of Scooter Productions. In case you don't remember, Scott's early efforts at filmmaking came under the guise of Scooter Productions named for Scott's dog he had in grade school. I think seeing some of those films might bring tears to my eyes (from laughing so hard). Scott, write soon! I raise my glass to you. Oh yeah, Kathy Foley McKee wrote this week about her initial impressions of her new job in counseling. Believe me Scott, I think Kathy has some material that will make a great sequel to "One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest". After she "talks" with us at the reunion, I just hope she changes our names in her diary to protect our identities.
That reminds me about an experience I had this week on the plane to DC. I had to make a connection in Atlanta to go on to DC and upon boarding the plane in Atlanta I found myself sitting next to one of the most beautiful women I have ever seen. I overcame my usual shyness and asked what kind of work she did and what was taking her to Washington. She quickly informed me that she was going to the National Nymphomaniac Convention in DC as a guest lecturer drawing from her personal experience to debunk popular myths about sexuality. After I wiped the sweat from my brow, my curiosity took over and I asked about these "myths". She professionally responded that one myth surrounds the thesis that African American men have the most well-endowed members when in fact it is the American Indian who is more likely to have this trait. She also pointed out that Frenchmen have the reputation of being the world's greatest lovers when in reality it is men of Jewish descent that are really fine in this department. It was about this time that this beautiful woman realized that she did not know my name and I had not asked hers. I guess this oversight embarassed her a little and she blushed stating that she really should not be going on about such a subject without knowing my name. Being so intrigued by her knowledge and her beauty, without thinking, I just blurted out my true indentity and said, "Wonderful to meet you, I'm Tonto Goldstein." (I'm certain many of you did not know that to be my real name. It has been tough on me all these years keeping it a secret.) We had a great time in Washington.
It is graduation time around small towns everywhere and in Marion, Arkansas three young ladies will be sharing the honor of being valedictorian of their Class of 2000. Jill Lumpkin (daughter of Diane Madison Lumpkin) and Laura and Lindley Fogleman (twin daughters of Gail Thaxton Fogleman) will have that distinction at Marion this year. Diane mused that it is amazing that 30 years ago these girls' mothers were graduating together. Congratulations to Jill, Laura and Lindley as well as to Diane and Gail. I tell you, it is the gene pool! I will bet these three young ladies are just as beautiful as their mothers are (in addition to being intelligent). Diane also told me that Ricky Wiggins is living in Marion, too. Diane, please tell Gail and Ricky to drop me a line.
Cherry Lou talked with Ann Gardner and Bobbye Ellen Davis this week. I would like to have heard that conversation. As this reunion gets ever closer, I'm starting to fret about being able to recognize everyone, but I guess I can use a line from my favorite quipster Oscar Wilde, who once said when he saw someone he didn't remember, "I'm sorry, I don't recognize you, I have changed a lot." I am sure time has changed a lot about us except the smiles.
To all you mothers out there ---- Happy Mother's Day!!!
Love ya all, joe (Miles from Newport)
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